Search

09 March 2012

right to pass revoked in LA


Following approval from the city council issued at its emergency sitting late last night, property owners across Los Angeles revoked unilaterally the rights of pedestrians to use private property, including privately owned sidewalks. This move has been expected for months, since LA's city council long ago abandoned her pedestrian population, preferring rather to kowtow to rich property owners who because of their great wealth can have laws written in their favor by bribing and influencing elected leaders.

Attention pedestrians of southern California: you may not use a privately owned sidewalk unless you have on your person written permission from the property owner! Instead, use the street, the roadway, or any publicly owned sidewalk (which are stamped with City Of Los Angeles, whereas private sidewalks are embedded with polished bronze medallions that warn walkers to turn back). The Los Angeles Police Department is issuing tickets upwards of $1000 to any individual caught using or otherwise trespassing on a privately owned sidewalk.

Anyone not driving a car by now is just not worth our time, nor are they worth any effort,” LA councilman Hinnrich Rheingoldt was overheard saying just after the sitting ended. “We just don't have time to protect economically insignificant, litigation-shy, foot-mobile fuckheads who aren't buying us flights to Mammoth, or who haven't contributed to any of our political action committees.”

場黑麥 ioanni elymucampus fecit

p.s. cars have right-of-way in the street, so stay on your toes unless you want to get sucked into the slipstream of a passing semi-truck and tossed around like a rag-doll

No comments: