In lieu of presents
To know your presence
americanifesto.com | updated Tuesday, Thursday, Sunday
31 December 2018
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haiku 24 Dec
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05 December 2018
haiku 4 Dec 2018
Under a slim moon
Their tender young love flourished
And inspired all
[ americanifesto / 場黑麥 / jpr / urbanartopia / whorphan ]
Their tender young love flourished
And inspired all
[ americanifesto / 場黑麥 / jpr / urbanartopia / whorphan ]
03 December 2018
lobotomy performers wanted
Following a sharp rise in applications to drive for a certain ride-sharing app, the second-most popular industry platform in the U.S. is seeking doctors willing to perform up to a dozen lobotomies per day. The medical procedures are part of the pink-fonted company’s policy of ensuring their drivers make only the worst possible decisions when it comes to operating a motor vehicle - that they run stop signs, ignore pedestrian crosswalks, swerve, brake, and make u-turns unexpectedly, and in general drive in the manner of pissed-off teenagers sitting on bladders bursting with day-old energy drink.
“If the people who drive for us don’t do everything in their power - legal or otherwise - to reach someone needing a ride as soon as is humanly possible, we might lose market-share to a four-letter competitor,” said the company’s chief operating officer. “Therefore, removing the part of our drivers’ brains that is responsible for controlling higher level decision-making ensures a maximum profit-margin at relatively low long-term cost to the company.”
Expect to find lobotomized drivers menacing a neighborhood near you, sometime soon.
[ americanifesto / 場黑麥 / jpr / urbanartopia / whorphan ]
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