now and swiftly

To combat the dangers of crime and of stealing we’ve crafted some unique solutions for dealing with persons who appear to gain pleasure from absconding with precious items and cash sums. First we teach our children that nothing is theirs, that kids are happier when they give and share; we then reinforce this by assisting they who request our help on a money-short day. We barter with labor and barter with goods and barter with things that we picked in the woods and thus we avoid the trap that many feel when wondering whence might come their next hot meal. Few doors remained locked for long due to this lesson: worry less and donate unwanted possessions to a local shelter or kids’ charity then bask in the warmth of true humanity. By helping out others when they need it most and acting the part of a welcoming host we create communities healthy and vibrant without using methods reserved but for tyrants such as police forces or too many laws (therefore Grigovia garners much applause). We here are anarchists and raise our kids thus - we teach them to care less for wealth or for stuff; we cultivate in them such notions, you see, as kindness openness goodness charity. The sick receive care here the homeless some shelter the weak and downtrodden a sound timely helper (if this should sound like your own hot cup of tea then make for Grigovia now and swiftly).

© JPR / whorphan / americanifesto / 場黑麥

Ξ¥=∏ЇƟЇ∏=¥Ξ

we sit here and play like we did in the past and both of us know that this fun cannot last

wont to weather

Now hear this brief fable, this conjuring mine, about sheep led by wolfs and governed by swine. Each sheep believed he had to buy his own house; and live separated from those of his flock; and choose just one other whom to call his spouse; and build up equity; and punch a timeclock. His grandfather’s systems did help him get wealthy and helped keep his little ones fleeced out and healthy but then swine took power and grabbed up the loot - for him and his kinfolk they gave not a hoot. The wolves then declared war for no solid reason and dragged that war on for innumerable seasons until the poor sheep and his poor kinfolk they were fully bled out and could no longer pay. The wolves and swine then said: ‘Just look what you’ve done! Where there was once bounty now there isn’t none! You and your weak siblings did drain this land dry!’ and so forth did go on their blame-shifting cry. The sheep had no means wit or motivation to defend his lowly and weak position; he bent to the grindstone and labored some more in hopes of making things as they were before. His freedoms were gone though as were all the funds for the pigs had eaten up every last crumb and the dogs had spent every nickel on killing wherefore there was not left e’en one single shilling. The thieves then sat back and watched the sheep-folk toil to coax a few weeds from the much-poisoned soil and laughed at their labors and laughed at their tears and kept right on laughing for many more years. Great numbers of sheep were thus turned into slaves their offspring did fill up the warmongers’ graves and though sheep are mighty when they work together there’s not much alone that they are wont to weather; they lived on in slavery until at last each one of them let out his ultimate gasp and died so that others might live well instead with blood-thirsty greediness stuck in the head.

© JPR / whorphan / americanifesto / 場黑麥

our foundations lean

This here is our mantra this here is our verse - there’s nothing that beats the power of the purse. In order to avoid the bane of corruption Grigovia won’t sanction much regulation of foodstuffs or services, cars or clothing - we allow the market to handle such things. If local bank houses should be poised to fail our government doesn’t get ready to bail - instead it sits back and chooses to relax then nature dictates which house should get the ax. If crime or malfeasance is clearly rife though we won’t hesitate to let dark colors show - we’ll punish the parties or persons who dare to cheat others out of proportionate share. Such punishment might take the form of a fine or in severe cases a spell of jail-time but such extreme measures as assigning blame are not part of our standard governing game. For most part all is fair we don’t intervene it’s upon liberty our foundations lean which means that now more than anytime before this ancient rule applies: caveat emptor.

© JPR / whorphan / americanifesto / 場黑麥

leap and frolic

Her temple’s a cubby or similar nook done up with white fabric and at least one book into which is then placed a candy or two a lit stick of incense and one ribbon (blue). Do reuse the ribbon (the goddess won’t mind so long as if too frayed it’s replaced in kind) and keep clean this space - it’s a thought-arena endowed to her majesty Nuuzstathena. From such a small space she’s been known to lend aid upon persons who to her prayers just made as well as to others who know of her not who never turned to her a moment of thought. Impartial and courteous, truthful and still, she helps us to swallow life’s more bitter pills she treats all us humans as objects of love which she does watch over from her perch above. With chant and bell-ringing with dance and with song her followers prance leap and frolic along their voices adoring their ribbons unfurled to share her good teachings with all of the world.

© JPR / whorphan / americanifesto / 場黑麥

him a joke

Him whorphan love conflict love charging headlong with heart bright and buoyant with throat screaming song. Him love look at girlies him too shy to talk him rather go alone on favorite walk around big big city until foot should make a terrible torment a terrible ache. Him whorphan love trolling the Internets most one eye peeled for falsehood one peeled for a ghost that puts on a hood made of hatred and lies that speweth forth anger from them beady eyes. He make him a joke out of most everything he trust in the goddess she with the black wing made up of the tendrils that see and that claw the most fearful woman he ever did saw. To home this here whorphan will surely return the lessons and beauty of Bali to learn he just need him cashflow to get bigger fast a noble and tricksy much difficult task.

© JPR / whorphan / americanifesto / 場黑麥

slick and relentless

Our systems are scanning they’ve made a detection and as we have feared it’s a true missed erection. Oh my what is that thing? Oh yeah, never mind - it’s just a fine plump and quite rotund behind a wonder to behold a beautiful thing that for some sweet action does seem to be lusting. Is this shlong still hard or must I pause to wait and walk with a bow legged cowboy-like gait to keep them from pinching these pendulous balls the source of much praise and ovative applause.? A meteor’s coming! There’s dire climate change! A fool does harangue us with hatred and rage! Hot dog this girl’s ready and willing at that so long as I strap on a tight jimmy-hat. Keep just her in mind and don’t dare criticize the wars greed and stealing the sadness and lies - if there is one constant in this election it’s steady slick and relentless misdirection.

© JPR / whorphan / americanifesto / 場黑麥

government regulates walking

Following a rash of locomotion-related injuries, the U.S. Department of Health proposed new laws to govern how and how quickly the American people should be allowed to walk. “Thousands of citizens are injured each year when they moving their bodies through this temporal realm at an increased speed without paying enough attention to where they are going,” said Hennrick Thallumann-Errins, the agency’s deputy director of public relations. “Once Congress passes provisional bill ST2240 b.d4, individuals who walk, run, jog, or otherwise move about in such a manner as to potentially harm themselves will face fines no greater than five hundred dollars or fourteen days in jail, per incident.” Walking occurs when a human’s upper body begins to fall forward but then catches itself with the legs, one after another, thus propelling it in a direction of the mind’s choosing. “The American people don’t seem to know how to get around on foot without running into household objects, tripping over curbs, stepping on errant rocks, or otherwise hurting themselves,” said Dr. Wilmina F. Fitzcharles, a gait specialist at the University of St. Stipan in Des Moines, Iowa, who was not directly involved with the proposed legislation. “Hopefully, these pending measures will ensure that people spend absolutely every iota of their brains’ attentive capacity on the act of walking, an act fraught with danger.” Legislation is being drafted to punish citizens who cannot perform similar daily tasks well, such as bathing, breathing, and swallowing. Due to the apparent absurdity of the laws mentioned above, most civil rights groups contacted for this story failed to comment.

© JPR / whorphan / americanifesto / 場黑麥

for-profit crosswalk

Tallahassee, Florida, made history today by switching on America’s first commercial road-traversing-assistance system. Composed of a pair of lights - red for ‘stop’ and green for ‘go’ - mounted atop a metal pole that has a credit-card reader bolted to it for processing payments, the system regulates foot-bound traffic across the eight-lane intersection at Sherman and Main Boulevards. With three strip-malls and two long-term elderly care centers, the intersection was apparently chosen for its potential to generate profits. “Following numerous complaints submitted by motor-vehicle operators apparently tired of waiting for slow-moving citizens to shuffle across this intersection at their own pace, we of the Tallahassee city council wisely decided to install this system,” said Ernesto Wainbight, the city’s deputy mayor. Manufactured by Assisted Crossing Inc. (ACI), from Atlanta, Georgia, the system charges pedestrians $2.50 for each crossing, a bargain according to company CEO Wendell F. Graus. “No driver I know is happy to see his way barred to allow some penniless walker to safely negotiate a busy intersection. And, with ACI’s new mobile-phone application, pedestrians in the process of negotiating the aforementioned intersection can now buy more time to cross the road, should they need it.” Each additional dollar spent extends a person’s crossing time by 30 seconds. Civil rights groups around the nation have criticized the move, claiming that it discriminates against persons who choose to change the temporal positions of their bodies using their own physical power, infringing upon their legal right to freedom of movement. “Foot-mobile citizens should be delighted that the price of a service they too long took for granted costs roughly the same as a cup of gourmet coffee,” Mr. Graus continued. “Nothing’s free in this life, especially not convenience, locomotion, or safety.” Eighty percent of the profits generated by the new system will be used to enrich the executive staff of ACI, whereas the additional twenty percent will fill the city council’s slush fund.

© JPR / whorphan / americanifesto / 場黑麥