Despite having had access to at least four separate dictionaries since moving back in with his parents three years ago, local hipster Sheldon T. Whittiesworth, 34, cannot seem to progress beyond ‘cool’. Whether it’s a wicked new movie or a sublime solar eclipse, Sheldon uses ‘cool’ as his go-to superlative expression in times of supreme emotionality and intense agitation.
Among the things, events, and places that Mr. Whittiesworth defined as being ‘cool’ are his thousand-dollar mobile phone, the birth of his first child, and the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam, NL. According to sources, Sheldon recently experimented with using the word ‘rad’ for a few weeks before reverting to his previous monosyllabic and thermological preference.
Persons close to Mr. Whittiesworth indicate that, out of all units of language available, the last word they think about when contemplating his existence is ‘cool.’
americanifesto / 場黑麥 / jpr / urbanartopia / whorphan
No comments:
Post a Comment