Another group of avowed peacerists was discovered today on a sizeable ranch east of suburban San Diego, California, USA. At least seven individuals were removed from the compound for questioning, all of whom flashed ‘victory’ fingers, known in America as the ‘peace’ sign. Also found on the secluded premises were huge stockpiles of hugs, positive feels, kind words, heartfelt gestures, and other such sappy drivel. Experts indicate that the group was readying to launch a campaign of unconditional loving affection in the upcoming months, or even weeks.
Authorities destroyed plots of spathiphyllum, or peace lilies, that were being cultivated in at least five greenhouses. “It’s crazy to think we’d find this kind of activity here, of all places,” said local sheriff Pietro Nunez-Smith. “I’m just glad these peacerists were found before they launched any type of caring, or affirmative, action.”
“This is a war-loving town,” said Georgina T. Robinsceau, a city councilperson. “Companies here produce and sell tens of billions of dollars of weapons to militaries, dictators, and militant groups around the world. Who would have imagined that vile peacerists would want to disrupt such commerce? I’m sickened.” The number of peacerists attacks on soft targets is expected to increase in direct proportion to the scale and scope of ongoing wars, worldwide.
[ americanifesto / 場黑麥 / jpr / urbanartopia / whorphan ]
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