Reline your stomach today with Relinerize!

ARE you tired of relying on your body to renew your stomach lining every week?

Bioregenetics International announced last week from its headquarters in Bangor, Maine, a revolutionary new way to ensure that the human stomach remains properly lined.

"People are fed up with the inconvenience of natural stomach lining regeneration," Dr. Thornton Churlish, director of product development at Bioregenetics, said. "Our product provides them with a feasible alternative to the weekly hassle of standard regeneration."

The new product, named Relinerize (TM), is a half pound of stomach lining starter cells that, once swallowed whole, lines your stomach with a more robust covering than usual, saving your body effort and reducing wasteful energy consumption. Clinical trials on Rhesus primates have shown a remarkable reduction in energy usage due to constant regeneration and a reduced dependency on shellfish as a major dietary supplement. Relinerize, which must only be taken once every three months, completely eliminates the natural process of stomach lining rejuvenation, a process that occurs regularly in most healthy people.

Studies have shown that the body often takes too long to reline the stomach, which, due to the constant presence of acidic digestive fluids crucial to the digestive process, is in a perpetual death spiral of destruction and rejuvenation. Relinerize adheres to the stomach wall and expands quickly to cover the entire organ with a thick coat of cells ten times the width of the average stomach wall.

"The thickness of a Relinerized (TM) stomach wall is the key to the product's success," Mary Yardmoth, lead researcher on the Relinerize developmental team, said. "With our new product, the speed of degradation to the stomach wall is slowed dramatically. An additional benefit of the Relinerized stomach's reduced capacity is marked but healthy weight loss similar but far superior to the invasive practice of stomach stapling."   

While Bioregenetics says that the ingestible version of Relinerize is easy to swallow, they have hinted at the development of a new, implantable, capsulized miniature biofactory that functions much like implantable birth control devices. "We understand that most consumers are willing and able to dry-swallow a half pound of gelatinous membrane," Churlish noted, "but there is a small segment of the population that would rather have a miniature cellular production factory sewn onto the outside of their stomach pouch."

Relinerize is shipped via special overnight delivery in a sleek foam container marked BIO-HAZARD in bold red lettering, making it easy to spot. The product must be ingested immediately to guarantee the highest rate of success. "We want to stress the importance of immediate consumption," Yardmoth said; "you can't just leave your shipment of Relinerize to bake in the hot sun out in your mailbox."

For further information, and to order your free sample of Relinerize, e-mail relinerizeinfo@bioregenetics.net